A blog on various topics related to Home and Living, Lifestyle, Entertainment, Relationships, Self Help, Fiction and Spirituality. I love to share some of my life incidences too on this blog, so if you want to know me more, just grab a cup of coffee and go through my life here!




A small book

Hello people,

Just now got done with the first mini-ebook of my own - "A simple life of miracles". Its just an 11 page ebook, stating some of my experiences, ideas, thoughts and analogies. Two of the experiences mentioned in the book have already been enlisted here in my blog.The book does not hold all of the magnificent experiences I've had till now. It just describes a few and gives a general idea.


I hope you enjoy it. Consider it as my new year gift to you. Have a wonderful, prosperous and magical year 2010 ahead.

Blessings to all,
Kimi

My past life diagnosis

I was just browsing through the channels on TV (for a change), not knowing what to see and I landed on this program - "Raaz pichle janam ka" being aired on NDTV imagine. I don't know how much authentic or fake the show is.

But it sure did intrigue me to this unknown realm of our journey. I have no particular notions or beliefs about rebirth and all. Still, out of curiosity I played a junk game that gives past life analysis (obviously this one was fake for sure!) and I got this:

"Your past life diagnosis: I don't know how you feel about it, but you were female in your last earthly incarnation.You were born somewhere in the territory of modern Sumatra around the year 1675. Your profession was that of a seaman, cook or carpenter.

Your brief psychological profile in your past life:
As a natural talent in psychology, you knew how to use your opportunities. Cold-blooded and calm in any situation.

The lesson that your last past life brought to your present incarnation:
The timid, lonely and self-confident people are everywhere, and your task is to overcome these tendencies in yourself and then to help other people. Do you remember now?"

My answer: Ofcourse not!! :D
My earliest manifestation as I remember

My earliest manifestation as I remember

Since I have so much free time today, sitting at my home , doing nothing except for reading a book “Spiritual Marketing” by Joe Vitale and just relaxing with the beautiful music in the background, I thought I can as well enrich my this beautiful blog with my earliest memory of manifesting my desires. So here it goes:


"Ever wondered from where does the story – “Alladin and his magic lamp” got generated? Ever wondered why kids have a knack to attain almost everything to themselves whenever they want, no matter the thing is available at that moment to them or not.

I’d like to share a very interesting experience of my own in this regard.

I was just five year old when I got a very weird fascination to the piano keys and its music. I absolutely adored the way piano is being played and the music that would come from it just used to touch my soul. I first saw the piano at my school and it totally drew my attention towards it. That time I didn’t even know what the instrument was called.

I was so mesmerized by the instrument that daily before going to sleep while lying on my bed, I would hum any song and make my fingers move in air, as if I was actually playing the instrument and enjoying the music coming out of it. I used to enjoy the feeling so much that it never occurred to me that I should go and actually play the instrument or ask my parents to get me one.

It was just a week or two since then, a distant friend of my father came to our home. It was a very strange visit since I’d never seen him coming to us before. He was carrying a red colored Casio synthesizer in his hands apparently for reasons again unknown to me. He was talking to my dad, while holding the synthesizer, when I entered the room. I saw the thing and immediately recognized the keys.

As I was standing there marveling the instrument, the guy looked at me staring at the instrument and just gave it to me so that I can play around with it. My father stopped him to do so, fearing I might break the instrument, but by that time I’d reached for the instrument. I took the synthesizer and started humming while playing the keys. What came next totally made my dad and the guy dumbstruck!

I ACTUALLY played the song, I was humming and my fingers were automatically working on the keyboard as if driven by some unknown force to play the music. I was completely in control of the music as if I was a veteran or something like that.

My dad and that guy both asked me if I’d ever played it before…I said “No!” which was a truth. The guy was so impressed with me that he simply GIFTED me the synthesizer (though my dad paid the price to him later!).

And I got the instrument to myself!!!.. "



What would you call this? – A Coincidence?. What if I tell you that this is the trend I’ve been following in almost everything I’ve desired so far?

What did you notice in above story? Can we define it as an "EPIPHANY" or a "DIVINE MANIFESTATION"?

To this date I play keyboard (a new and better one :P) being self-taught of it and music just flows from me. I have no idea how I do that. I never went for any lessons, no one ever taught me or guided me for that; and I absolutely adore the way my music and my creations with it have worked, till now :-) !!

Life is magical, all the times!
Thoughts and life...

Thoughts and life...

Power of thoughts: After giving much thought to this topic and its implementations in my life, I finally decided to start expressing my ideas here with a real live example from my life.

I’ll just start with the recent last one that I can remember vividly.

“January 2009 – I’d come back from New York, back to India, not in a good state of mind, thoroughly exhausted with the kind of work I’d been doing since past 5 years. It was same, it was stagnant, I hated the work culture- I was being in and I had no friends. I saw no aim in my life, the work was getting over my nerves and I desperately wanted to quit my job, go back home for a few months or so just to relax. Later on I thought I’d join some elementary school there in my hometown and become a teacher.
But obviously it was a much forbidden dream for me to make true especially in the times of recession, with my employer’s bond of Rs.4,20,000 to serve for another 6 months and that too when my parents were searching for a decent groom for me to get married to.
I spent the next two months fighting with myself, struggling somehow to adjust with the whole situation, trying to convince myself to compromise and live with it, all in vain.
In March 2009 end, I said to myself – “Enough!” and then I resigned. It gave me so much relief the moment I sent my resignation email to my manager. The feeling was tantamount to the one you'd feel while coming out of a jail. I was a free bird.

Nearly every one I knew that time boycotted my decision. 

“You’ll not get a job at this time! and the gap will really prove bad for your profile” ..
“Don’t quit, its recession time! You’ll have troubles later”…
“You have a bond with your employer for 6 months, you have to serve the company else you’d have to pay an amount of Rs. 4,20,000/-“ ….
“You will not get your onsite leaves encashed before 6 months of your service to your employer, after you are back from US …you fool!!! “
and blah blah blah!!!!

I asked my heart and just followed what it said. It felt so right that I took this decision without knowing what would be the outcomes of it. The night I resigned, I wrote a few lines in my diary…

“I am staying at my home, happy with my family. I have not served any notice period and have come to my home at the timing of my own choice. The bond fee of Rs. 4,20,000/- has been waived off. I have got my money as well as my onsite leaves encashment done with success and peace by my company. I am free, I am at peace and I am happy. Thank you very much.”

It looked like a very impossible prayer that time, the moment I wrote those words. I read them again; they looked like some highly anticipated dream. I kept on reading them, again and again and again…till the time I could actually FEEL the words and their meanings…and then I went so deep into those words that I felt the feeling of every sentence I wrote. I lived the moments and absolutely loved them, and then I slept.
What happened in next 3-4 months was something no body could believe. I went home in April, telling my manager that I can’t stand the office and work any more and I am going home on loss of pay leave till my last day in this company.
At home I received a mail from my manager stating that its fine, they can prepone my release date and make the next day as my last working day (1 wish manifested!! )
Now was the release process which was the most dreaded one. I talked to my HR manager who gratefully and surprisingly agreed to waive off my bond fee since she herself had given me an early exit from the company. (2nd wish manifested)
Next I got all my money along with my onsite leave encashment done properly to my account, without having any issues with the management. I spent a nice holiday time of around 4-5 months at my home before I decided what next to do in my life. 
Later I changed my mind and came back to Bangalore, went for my first interview without knowing what would happen and got the job the instant at almost double hike - yes! at the time of recession. This is the exact kind of job I wanted and I absolutely love it.”

I know , reading all these stuffs won’t make you feel the urgency of the situation, but I’d like to add here that many people who did the same act of quitting the company the way I did after coming back from onsite location (long term) faced the issues w.r.t the onsite leave encashment and bond fee. I also at one time received a mail from my employer's legal cell that I have to give them some 3 lakh rupees as a part of bond fee, but it all got settled in my favor. I may be lucky! I don’t know.

The only thing I had in my mind was my belief and I kept on tuning it to what I wanted all these times, as I used to live the words I wrote in my diary, every single day. You can call it a manifestation, or getting control of your life. We all make such miracles sometime or the other. Why dont we do it all the times? This is just one example of it. There are many more to site from my life since the times I remember that would go to the times when I was just 5 years old and I guess if I start writing them I’d need to write a whole book instead of just a blog article. I will try to :-) for the sake of my own fun. Till then just ponder over this fact –

“You can program your subconscious mind to do anything. It doesn’t matter whether you believe that you can do it or you can not; either way you are right!! “
Trying my hands on internet marketing.. :D

Trying my hands on internet marketing.. :D

I know no one is gonna buy this book, but still at least for my sake click on the link and see the stuff there. It might prove to be helpful to someone.... (Who knows!)

So here goes my first ad post. (For trial!)

"Turn Your Life Around in Less Than A Week"

How many people do you know who can honestly say they are living their dreams?
Are you?

How Many Times Have you wondered When The Real Change Is Going To Happen in Your Life?


(P.S.: Please post your comments no matter you read it or not. This whole activity is purely for fun... :-) I'd really appreciate it a lot.)
Patthar sulag rahe they

Patthar sulag rahe they

After much long time I'd been listening to one of my fav gazalz ..."Patthar sulag rahe they"
...Some of my all time fav lines from it-:

Patton ke tootne ki sadaa ghut ke reh gayi
jungle mein door door takk hawaa ka pataa na tha

parchaaiyon ke sheher ki tanhaaiyaan na pooch
apna shareek-e-gham koi apne siwa na tha
Love as I see....

Love as I see....

Love - a hail; a vitreous silica,
purity intense; firm like a stone,
too soon it melts; and then its gone..
Love - an ice berg; magnificent in itself,
hiding more; exhibiting less,
floats in its serenity; for the eternity....
Love - a storm; shatters the dreams
though pleases the one, who takes the blaze..
A need above all, that needs nothing at all,
except for the lover's face,
to live, to survive, to breathe, to smile
and then to go above this life's maze...
One crosses the purgatory here, whats left now to purify?
Love - a heaven , it doesn't matter whether you live or die..
A weirdo vs an Angel

A weirdo vs an Angel

A Weirdo: Do u think if i drink beer I'll feel better?
An Angel......: Nope
A Weirdo: ok! just a wild guess
An Angel......: Not at all!!!!
A Weirdo: I've seen it in movies
An Angel......: Now this is too much!!!
A Weirdo: When people get depressed, they start drinking; i thought they feel betterI know I'll die if i have beer with some sedative
I saw that too on TV....right?
An Angel......: hmmmmmmmm
A Weirdo: some air hostess died that way
An Angel......: and...
A Weirdo: few years back in mumbai
An Angel......: coke and menthol
A Weirdo: hmmmmmmm...lol....why to have poison? when death can be so easy and tastyand without pain!
An Angel......: you are thinkng to have drinks??
A Weirdo: No! Just got a random thought and got curious so asked you
An Angel......: bad!!!
A Weirdo: I've already had 4 large mugs of black cofee since morning - all bitter
Just now added half teaspoon sugar in one...and its tasting tooo much sweet to me now
An Angel......: Don't ever try this!!
A Weirdo: try what? coke and menthol?
An Angel......: No! Beer
A Weirdo: oh! lol oki cant stand the smell; even if i drink it..I guess I wont be able to swallow it
I might puke it outso dont worry
An Angel......: People get addicted this way only...
A Weirdo: hmmmmm
Sent at 3:35 PM on Wednesday
An Angel......: you work~~thats better
A Weirdo: ok

Re: Heart – Dead and Beating at the same time?

I never thought I could get a more than a practical answer to this question of mine so soon.
Life can be stranger than the ideas we get, and certainly weirder than this blog of mine.

All my hypothesis, experiences, conclusions about myself have been somehow tied around …handcuffed and asked to stand guiltily, heads down…at a corner for the first time; broken with smashes … while the miracle of life welcomes me with open arms…even though its like a short lived fairy tale dream of mine…

The first culprit, guilty of all charges:

“I don’t feel anything…Not in people’s world”

Amendments:

“I don’t feel anything…Not in people’s world” – except for the ones right for me…how could anyone know, when and where can you find them? Life sometimes just sends them to you as surprise gifts.
Second culprit:

“But where is the affinity?
Why can’t someone’s voice make me feel that?
- Or Someone’s song?
- Or Someone’s talks?
- Or Someone’s company for my walk? (Makes me rather uncomfortable!)
- Or my friends besides me while I look at the stars and moon… why I yearn to be alone then?
- Or a friend holding my hand to just play around with me in sea waves, why I have sudden urge to just leave and go along the waves far far away?
- Or someone’s presence?”

Amendments:

“But where is the affinity?” – How soon can we decide it?
“Why can’t someone’s voice make me feel that?” – How soon can that be decided without getting to listen to the voice that can make your heart melt?
“Or Someone’s song?” – What when some songs can make you want to listen to them forever of your existence?
“Or Someone’s talks?” – What when first time in my life I can know the beauty of just sitting and listening to someone…?
“Or Someone’s company for my walk? (Makes me rather uncomfortable!)” – This feeling that has got reversed can’t even be explained in words….making me fail in my art of expressions for the first time.
“Or my friends besides me while I look at the stars and moon… why I yearn to be alone then?” – Can I now?
“Or a friend holding my hand to just play around with me in sea waves, why I have sudden urge to just leave and go along the waves far far away?” – I can only imagine this one at present…
“Or someone’s presence?” – The most emphatic of all…

“Piano: Fascinating when I play…Tiring when others join in.”: Can “Tiring” be replaced by the word- “Euphoric” here?

Can a dead, beating heart be alive?....Seems like mine could…

And what if it can be burnt to ashes ….can the same heart break?

I Am Sorry!















..And I really mean it...

Just "three" words,

Can't change what I said unwillingly,

I can only try to heal,

Deep from my soul,

I meant no harm.

Deep from my heart

that conveys an apology...

It hurts like hell,

to hurt those who love me,

I pray for the best of all,

even if you don't believe me,

I still burn....Please forgive me!!
The Phenomenon

The Phenomenon

The nature dazzles me with its wonders every time I look at it. No matter where I am; what am I doing?

Somehow it has now felt my addiction towards it and may be now showering its love back to me in all these mini wonderful sights it shows to me.

This was another of the most magnificent gifts it has shown me till now.

I was leaving Bangalore on April 18th, 2009. Everything was going fine. I boarded my flight at 6:25 PM. It took off at 7 PM sharp.

The perfect twilight lied outside; though nothing was visible about the sky since it was all covered with dark clouds; supposed to be full of rain and thunder.

The plane took off and glided past the clouds; above them.
The view from my window here took my breath away for a moment. The horizon with its orange-blue color canvas along with the perfectly dark clouds laid there in the vastness; and then there was this huge wonder of the wonders; just lying between the indefiniteness of the dark stretch, ending in the drowning sunlight.

I blinked and saw it once more. Was it even real? Or may be I was dreaming. I pressed my eyes towards the tiny window and saw it again.

There was this some sort of miracle of the nature welcoming me in its grounds or rather skies.
A huge cloud, alone and just above its other group members and unbelievably in a shape of heart; Yes! .... exactly the curves of heart, lying there in front of me; so splendid; all made up of rain clouds only.

It looked as if it was submerged halfway in the huge ocean of the dark clouds below it. As I prolonged my incredulous stare on it; it thundered and its heart shaped walls just glowed in the lightening; as if it just acknowledged my stare back.

My senses went numb by the sight so powerful and spectacular. I still don't have words enough to describe it, yet I am doing this futile attempt to explain it here.

And again I felt frustrated about not carrying a camera in my hand. The glow; the whole presence was so magical; I didn't know how to react and suddenly my eyes were overwhelmed with tears (or by the lightening may be!! ).

The heart acknowledged it again and glowed more incandescently this time as if returning back my overwhelming emotions.

I stared at it and it remained silent as if it too was looking at me; silently; till the time my plane was crossing ; going far away from it.
The moment it was about to go away from my vicinity, it glowed again;fiercely this time; splashing the thunder so clearly, I could see the lightening between the two halves of the heart;
And it looked like; it just broke!

(P.S. I tried a lot searching any pic like that on google; couldn't find any to justify the whole thing. I don't know how much I explained the whole phenomenon. I still go in a state of trance when i remember the beauty of it. May be I can try to paint it sometime......or may be not!! )

Heart: Dead and beating at the same time?

Vacuum; a hole or many; and then the very thing – going into pieces.
The breath and the beat; all enough to keep it assembled: physically.
Wonder what happened; emotionally? how to decide that?
The fact that: I don’t feel anything?

But I do feel…

Not in a people’s world though. Sounds weird!! I know… to me too.

- Instrumental Music
- Books
- Endless walks in the woods and breeze.
- Staring at the moon and the stars in night sky.
- Watching the sea waves splashing my feet.
- Lying on the cold slide in the park; temperature - some -20 degree Celsius; eyes closed; music
in ears; full volume.
- Playing piano.
- Writing.
- Reading.
- Dreaming.
- Mirror.
- Voice.

But where is the affinity?

Why can’t someone’s voice make me feel that?
- Or Someone’s song?
- Or Someone’s talks?
- Or Someone’s company for my walk? (Makes me rather uncomfortable!)
- Or my friends besides me while I look at the stars and moon… why I yearn to be alone then?
- Or a friend holding my hand to just play around with me in sea waves, why I have sudden urge
to just leave and go along the waves far far away?
- Or someone’s presence?

Anyone?

Piano: Fascinating when I play…Tiring when others join in.

Human is a social animal.

What would you call an unsocial human?
Purgatory….

Purgatory….

What is?
The state of those who die in God’s friendship, assured of their eternal salvation, but who still have need of purification to enter into the happiness of heaven.

Can it lie on this mortal earth?
Who knows?
It feels as if one never was born despite a great master mirage making everyone believe it, but he has been serving this state of purgatory only since the times of his consciousness.

And how can the purification be done?..
I wonder!!
...

...

Its been months since
the tuberose spread its fragrance nearby..

Its been months since
she slept peacefully at night..

She fascinated the dark,and dreaded the days
She called for someone, and saw no trace..

"Where to go?" she asked herself,
and to her embarrassment,
she asked this to everyone else..

Her own seemed to be ditching her,
Can there be any escape?

They got confused at this strange question,
"Can't you see the landscapes?"
"You know your home, its always there for you" - they said,
She blinked at them,
trying to get some sense of that

"Can anyone let me go back to my sleep?" - she asked,
They stared at her,
doubting some insanity hidden and masked

"A sleep is what I desire,
the long pending one,
Where the dreams I see,
feel more real than this blazing sun"

No one answered, all she got was silence,
She went to the terrace and saw the sky,
Her best friends didn't seem, to be there,
the moon and the stars to bid her good bye..

"Wish me luck, if you can see me" she said with smiles,
"For I have to travel a long distance,may be some infinite miles",

And she slept her sleep,
the best of all..
Where there were only dreams and peace,
for her to carry on...

To the infinity
To the eternity...
and to the sanity......for all :)

Can I?..... I can!

What can a person do after going through a regular monotony of things he never thought he would do, but somehow because of some unknown reasons – had been doing them since so long, that they have actually become his life?


What would happen if he just snaps off from those things, without knowing what would be the outcome? Where would he go? Would he be able to do anything else that would give him pleasure and prosperity? What if in the due course of time he had actually forgotten what he really wanted to have and now even if he wants to do that – the time can’t be reversed?


These thoughts had been going into my mind since God-knows-when, but yes somehow unconsciously they were there, roaming around, browsing through my brain, wandering like an unwanted beetle, alone, different, somehow nasty from the rest of the crowd of thoughts.


Yesterday, before going to sleep, I closed my eyes, asked the divine (God, subconscious, higher self or any other nomenclature you want to give? – Please feel free!! :-)) what if I resign from my current job tomorrow? I had just two options in front of me:


1) What would I do if I resign from my current job?
2) What would I do if I don’t resign from my current job?


The answer to the second question was much easier and - painful. If there is some sort of name that can be given to the ailment – “Irritation-beyond-tolerance-because-of-the-software-jargons-and-coding-scenes”, then I might be having that to an extreme level, which can reach and pass the need of appropriate medication and surgery if there is any.


And the irony is that I am a software engineer since past more than five years , now gone to a higher version so that I can be called a “Module Leader” having a “Red Tag”(a mark of five years seniority) in my company which is even funnier since right now there is no module for me to lead.


And after around 2 years of leaving the rigorous coding areas, I am forced to do that now, which is similar to hurting me with 1000 nails piercing again and again, daily.


The only subconscious and outward reasoning for this torture -


i) What comes from my bosses and dad:


– “Recession time - If you quit, you’d not get any job”.
– “Don’t demand so much about your roles and work, we are lucky enough to get work for our people, so better do what is given to you.”
– “Be happy that at least you are getting full salary in these crunch times.”


ii) What comes from my mom is:
- “We won’t get a decent groom for you if you quit now.”


iii) What comes from me is:
- “Do I have a life of my own? “


Now coming to the first question – “What would I do if I resign today?”


The first reaction that came – “Blank”.


I had no idea what to do leaving aside softwares and coding, having being groomed to this very field since so long now.


After two minutes, images could come out of the clouds. I could see myself working here for another 2 months, during which I’d plan to change the course of my job, to teaching or may be quality assurance.
Worst scenario I’ll go home, take a break for sometime, stay at home, relax, play music on my favorite piano, join VLCC and lose some weight!! ;), give tuitions to kids etc etc.


And my mind went calm. I have the degree, I have the experience, I have the brains, I have some savings and I have H1 Visa too lol !! ;). It wouldn’t be too bad than what is it now!


And I can trust!! :). So here I leave!

Random..(Just to begin with, after so long break!! )

It has already been two months now, since I'd left New York. Can't believe its the same time I wrote my last post here.


Time has been on a crunch state after coming back to India, with loads of things to bother about, that has included me searching for a decent project (have got one to just pass around with; for a few months of bond period I have), cooking (loads and loads of!!...phew) and washing clothes on a daily basis!! : (I hate it!).


And its been months since i'd gone for a long walk in the woods; with music blaring in my ears, gentle tickling breeze blowing around my hair - (How much I miss those walks now! :( )
Anyways, life goes on and at present I've found my solace with the stars and the moon. It is a bliss to spend hours at night just staring at the stars (not much you can see in the city of Bangalore though!) and the sky (which is much neonish than the pitch darkness it is supposed to have).


I wonder sometimes how much mystery does the space outside and inside us can hold? I mean, look at the stars; millions and billions of them, even more. Some might have perished on the way while sending their light to us; so may be we are watching the stars that existed some thousands of years ago. Can I say it to be a kind of time travel?
Anyways, just my wonders in my head; there are loads of things to ponder about.


Last weekend I went to Coorg with a couple of my friends and their team mates. Overall a nice experience; change - atleast for me since I was away from the pollution and dust for some golden period of time; and I could even breathe easily (without sneezing or coughing after every 5th breath :( ). It felt bad to see such a beautiful place in so much dirt and negligence. Ok! Let me not go into that depressing talk. And I am not going into the details of the whole trip; it was tiring, experiencing it once only; so just a summary :P


The journey was pleasant and the weather was just perfect and everything else too like -
the big, spacious and amazing farmhouse we'd booked; the dense forests and their greenry; the water falls (we couldn't go in and had a big mood-drop); the origin of kavery; the campfire(almost a flop show since all went to sleep after just two hours of sitting there and a dare game!); the spicy food; the unexpected trip to another waterfall (where we could go in "yippeee"...), its dirty and cold water; the big snake we found there on the rocks from the jungle, which almost attacked a guy (I never knew snakes can rise so high above the ground :O ); our fleeing away from the place; the Dumb-C and Antakshari games in our bus and finally a climax with a visit to Mysore Brindawan garden.


But the most spectacular thing for me happened early morning on the last day of my trip, while sitting at the courtyard of the farmhouse, having my morning coffee, staring at the clean sky and the fading moon, inhaling as much fresh air as i can. (If possible I could have just stored it somewhere and taken along with me to bangalore!! : ) ) and then a shining bright blue ball of light, just zoomed around from somewhere in the sky and then, it vanished; just in three eye-blinks. I stared at it for a moment, even when it was gone....


Now here I'd like to tell something, since i watch the night sky for 1-2 hours almost daily, it has been a trend that every now and then I get a glimpse of a shooting star... :P (I wish i could take a pic some day!)


But a shooting star in day time? :O...That too of blue color was something I've never heard about. I wish so much now to have caught a pic of that amazing view.


Still, no matter how silly it seems, I made a wish!!:)...as I do every time I see one..


And since this one was somewhat special...so was the wish too!! :D


PS: Don't ask me what I wished for!! :P

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